Your Anonymity is Really Cowardice

I appreciate comments, congratulatory and disparaging alike. However, anonymous drivel will be deleted, as it adds nothing. Kindly unmask yourself. That's all for now, folks! ;) 

Vintage Paper Mache Pig Halloween Mask from Recycled Wares

It'll be Ben and Jerry again.

Crapsnaggle! It appears as if I'll be single again for Valentine's Day. Instead of having my own Chunky Monkey, I'll no doubt be lapping up some of Ben & Jerry's Chunky Monkey. This little monster about sums up my feelings.

$14 for Feb 14:

Little Broken Heart Monster, $10  Laura Roberts Art
Coupon for a Pint, $4 Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream

just a few ideas for my 2010

Tuesday's Child, Monday Birthday

Well, my birthday is just a few days away and I thought I'd share my list of wants. Mind you, this is an exercise in creativity, as my family and offline friends don't read my blog. If they did, they'd probably comment, like nice online friends. Sorry, rant over.

First off, a full-time job. I need the revenue.  Once I land my sweet gig I plan on enjoying benefits like dental insurance. These four cavities won't fill themselves! A cleaning isn't too hard on the funds, but fillings drill deep into the wallet.  After a couple paychecks, I'll splurge on new contact lenses. My two-year- old veterans finally had enough and are now torn. My geek glasses are actually a slightly stronger prescription and constantly sliding off my face, which means I'm not living up to my mantra, "Tuesday's child is full of grace."

I actually have gotten pre-birthday money from one parent, and have been informed I may get post-birthday money from another. I guess that neutralizes the matter, as if both were received on the actual day. Currency gives me plenty of opportunity to take care of some expenses/purchases, but I won't be spending it on random gubbins.

But let's say I did....here's what I'd indulge in:

Mini UV Sanitizing Wand
No, I'm not like TV's OCD detective Monk. I just think this would come in handy for situations I may find myself in. You know, like, life.

The Mighty PowerPack
This is a tad more practical, as I've been known to leave lights on and have low tire pressure. As I'm going to do some camping, I'll need backup power, so again, handy gizmo. I tried researching various multi-tasking power thingamabobs, and this one seemed to be a fair price point, weight, capacity and have the feaatures I want. If anyone knows more about this gizmos, particularly recommendations, let me know.

Go Go Gadget Juicer
This one even shocks me. Never imagined I'd have a hankering for a gurgling, blade running, produce pummeler, so I blame it on my growing health concerns and late night infomercials. It's a bit of an overwhelming science, it seems, to decipher the pros/cons of the various makes/models. Again, recommendations welcome. Waring offers a model under $60 with favorable reviews, so I'm slightly partial due to the thrift factor. Breville makes some quite stylish (also well-reviewed) models, but for a higher markup. Unfortunately, super man Jack Lalanne's juicer reviews haven't been as impressive as his remarkable health. I'll keep my eye on eBay and see if I can store a deal.

Well, what else does a girl need?

On the Move

I'll be gracing Atlanta for the next several weeks, with the occasional jaunt back to my home state and wherever else the wind blows.

This image is lovely, found it on Flickr. It's by Dan Froy and you can buy a print or a card of it here. (It's copyrighted, so don't snag it without attribution!)

Professional Bio

The Random Questionnaire

My cousin tagged me with this on Facebook. I thought I'd share with the world; I don't have any secrets to hide, at least not in these 50 questions.


1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Despite popular belief, I wasn't named after Audrey Hepburn. I was named after a book character and also TV show character (Audrina, Audra, I believe) and my mother liked the name.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? 2 days ago maybe?

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? I like to laugh at it.

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? I'm not a huge lunch meat fan, but I do love a good sliced chicken & havarti sandwich...and all the meats that stack on the cubans at that place off 14th St (Atlanta)...

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Nope

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? I would aspire to be friends with the wise and might Audrey

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM? (Insert Little Britain quote here)

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Unfortunately I do, although they are abnormally large and lots of tax paying citizens agree it's time they got knifed.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? If you push me

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Kashi Go Lean Crunch for a nutritious & delicious pick; ghetto brand Frost-ed Flakes, if you're keeping it real

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Why would I? Do I look like I wear shoes with laces?

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? I prefer gelato, but as for ice cream I guess cookies 'n cream....I've passed enjoying eating cookie dough ice cream and prefer instead the raw dough goodness

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? First, whether or not they are holding a weapon (visible). Second, could they be packing concealed? Third, do they have food or look like they could afford to buy? Fourth, oh wait...you only asked for first...

15. RED OR PINK? Depends on the shade

16. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? Procrastination. I'll write more about it later.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? Friends I haven't seen in ages, in far away locales

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST? Of course.

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? I don't like where this is going.

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? birds chirping

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Tenacious Teal

23. FAVORITE SMELL? Man

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? my dad

25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Yeah, she's my superhero cousin!

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? Hockey, live, good seats

27. HAIR COLOR? Dark as ever

28. EYE COLOR? Prettiest green you'll ever see

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Yes

30. FAVORITE FOOD? We all know that Hamburger Helper makes a great meal.

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Okay, look, first the pants question now "happy endings?" Seriously, who wrote these questions....me??

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? You know I don't do film.

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Seafoam green

34. SUMMER OR WINTER? Depends what continent I'm on

35. HUGS OR KISSES? Hisses.

36. FAVORITE DESSERT? Do you have to keep brining up the fact that I like raw cookie dough?

37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? The ladies

38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? The guys

39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? "Justice for All: Earl Warren and the Nation He Made," by Jim Newton

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? No mouse, no pad.

41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? No TV, went to bed early.

42. FAVORITE SOUND(S)? "Cha-ching," and laughter

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Beatles

44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? Geographically, perhaps Hawaii? Not sure.

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Ask my toes.

46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Columbia, SC

47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? YOURS!

48. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER? I'm single.

49. IS THE CUP HALF FULL OR HALF EMPTY? If you're really thirsty, it's half empty. If you're full, it's half full.

50. IF YOU COULD SIT DOWN TO DINNER WITH FIVE PEOPLE WHO WOULD YOU CHOOSE? Earl Warren, the apostle Paul, Agatha Christie, Andy Griffith, Salvador Dali.....most random conversation ever, oh and can Amy Sedaris cater? Thanks.

Faves

Art gallery?
20 x 200, because it's pretty democratic


Job?
Globetrotter, ink blotter, truth spotter



Secret skill?
Making figurines out of polymer clay

Professor?
Stegeman, Drexel University




Sushi?
Couple spots I can recommend depending on what city you're in, but as for rolls, I'm partial to the spicy tuna or eel.
Chocolate?
I've savored some of Belgian's finest while visiting, and find truffles to be a satisfying treat. I am also charmed by the simple inexpensive Palmer's easter bunny, hollow, and more milk than chocolate, but enchanting nonetheless.

Drugstore find?
Those glide on sticks for migraines actually help!

Four letter word?
Toss up between "Jive," and "Hoss."


Song?
That's a tough one, because there's a lot of classics. I really enjoy Mark Ronson's "Stop Me." It was one of the songs I always rocked out on my iPod walking around UCLA's campus (studied there during a summer session).



Character?
Cartoon or otherwise? I've met a lot of interesting characters, and currently I'm compiling a book of short stories based around the simple and complex personalities of everyday people. But if you're asking cartoon, I guess the classic is Scooby Doo. And the Smurfs, another brilliant Belgian creation!

Gift?
I am always happy when someone cares enough to get me a gift. I've received a lot of great things, and love seeing what the person has selected. I guess a simple gift that I've hung onto for many years is a Kermit the Frog Pez dispenser. It was from a fellow classmate when I was doing my study abroad in London. I was hospitalized for a week, due to a bleeding ulcer, and lots of people I'd just met came and visited me at Saint Mary's. This guy couldn't make it, but he sent the dispenser inside with a sweet note and just one Pez candy. It was weird and touching all at once.

Clothing designer?
I'm a sucker for vintage, and enjoy suits by Chanel and Oleg Cassini. I adore Diane von Furstenburg, Tracey Reese, and Julie Brown dresses. And Velvet by Graham and Spencer makes cotton dresses you can live in. I'd like to stretch out on the island in a Velvet dress, sand in toes, right about now.

25 Random Audrey Facts

Audrey:

1. has been to all 50 states in the USA.
2. loves espresso; illy and lavatazza are fave brands.
3. speaks a tiny bit of Mandarin Chinese after years of study.
4. loves to dance to reggae music.
5. speaks some Spanglish.
6. is a pro at scoring toys out of "claw" vending machines, once having to haul off a garbage bag full.
7. still has some archived articles on Philly's CityPaper online.
8. enjoys Texas Hold 'em, and was going to be a dealer for special events in Atlanta.
9. knows that waitressing is one of the hardest jobs in the world.
10. can bachata y merengue with the best of them!
11. took 2 black and white photography classes in college and loves old school B&W imagery.
12. makes a wicked pineapple casserole.
13. likes homemade soap scented with essential oils.
14. makes up dances to cheer up sick and depressed people.
15. enjoys poetry and spoken word readings, and likes to share her work.
16. and best friend Sharon make up "GRQs"--Get Rich Quick Schemes but rarely do them.
17. loves the work of both David and Amy Sedaris.
18. tears up when watching Grand Hotel.
19. sold cups of kool-aid for a quarter while attending a marketing conference in high school.
20. actually had fun at camp as a kid.
21. savors visiting places with fresh, clean air that revives the senses.
22. draws comics when she can't fall asleep.
23. calls herself a "Curator of Knowledge" . . .
24. took speech class in elementary school so she could say the letter, "R."
25. missed a lot of critical math classes in order to speak that letter, "R."